...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I could fuck to npr.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
