I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Randomize
