I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
