eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Randomize
