On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
