Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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