i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
Randomize
