that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
We are two peas in an std pod
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
