whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Two words: blizzard sex
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
