no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
So much Jack, so little girl.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
