I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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