Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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