on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
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