When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
