i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize