Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
