i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
