College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
two words...techno handjob
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Dick very happy bro
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
