found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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