Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
