Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
