One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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