i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
