I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
