so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Randomize
