Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
