I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize