a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize
