quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Omg I joined a choir last night...
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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