PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
