There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
Randomize
