I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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