The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
