he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
