They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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