Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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