i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
