so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
What a dumb baby whore.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize