I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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