Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Randomize
