when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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