Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
