a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
