At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Its about making memories worth repressing
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
