I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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