The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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