How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
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