He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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