Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
