Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
