okay pat passed out under dana's car
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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